Happiness is like a butterfly; the more you chase it,
The more it will elude you, but if
You turn your attention to other things,
It will come and sit softly on your shoulder.
Henry David Thoreau
What do you think Thoreau was trying to convey in this quote about happiness? Have you found this to be true in your life? Might happiness be the result of other goals and objectives?
Please join me as we take a deep dive into the complexities of finding happiness. We will be exploring happiness from a historical perspective and examining different points of view regarding the pursuit of happiness. We will discuss the elements of the Law of Attraction and how our perception (subjective well-being) impacts our sense of happiness.
In today’s blog, I will be sharing my experience using the book, The Happiness Project, as a group coaching tool, and will be providing you information on a free six-week class offered by Harvard University, titled Managing Happiness. Finally, we will be discussing the Life Satisfaction Index A, an online, self- assessment tool that can help you determine how satisfied you are with your life at this point in time.
Historically, we can trace the pursuit of happiness back to July 4, 1776, when our forefathers wrote the Declaration of Independence. The committee charged with drafting the historic document deemed the pursuit for happiness important enough to include it as an unalienable Right, along with life and liberty, saying:
“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.
The Law of Attraction
However, throughout history, we find scholars, philosophers and social scientists taking a different point of view in terms of the pursuit of happiness. Many learned individuals have suggested that happiness isn’t something to be found, it is something to attract. Today, there are numerous books and articles written about the Law of Attraction. It is a philosophy that believes positive thoughts will bring positive results into a person’s life.
The Law of Attraction is designed with 3 Laws – attracting, creating and allowing. The steps involved in making space for the things you desire in life are:
- Ask the universe for What You Want. Every day, you send out requests to the universe-as well as your subconscious mind – in the form of thoughts.
- Believe You’ll Get What You Want…
- Receive What You Want with Gratitude
Subjective Well-being
I think we would agree that typically, happiness is an emotional state characterized by feelings of joy, satisfaction, contentment, and fulfillment. Because happiness tends to be a broadly defined term, psychologists and other social scientists often use the term “subjective well-being.” Happiness is individual. It is subjective. It is on a continuum. At any given time, we can be more or less happy. Happiness involves perception. We have all heard the saying that some people see the glass half empty while others see the glass half full.
As we think about happiness, it might be helpful to consider the two components of happiness (or subjective well-being):
- The balance of emotions: Everyone experiences both positive and negative emotions, feelings, moods. Happiness is associated with things in our lives that generate positive emotions.
- Life Satisfaction: This relates to how satisfied we feel in different areas of our lives. How satisfied are we with our relationships, work, achievements?
While the perception of happiness may vary from person to person, there are some key signs that psychologists look for in measuring and assessing happiness, they include:
- Feeling like you are living the life you wanted
- Going with the flow and willing to take life as it comes
- Feeling that the conditions of your life are good
- Enjoying positive, healthy relationships with other people
- Feeling that you have accomplished (or will accomplish) what you want in life
- Feeling satisfied with your life
- Feeling positive more than negative
- Being open to new ideas and experiences
- Practicing self-care and treating yourself with kindness and compassion
- Experiencing gratitude
- Feeling like you are living life with a sense of meaning and purpose
- Wanting to share your happiness and joy with others
As you review this list, what are your thoughts? On a scale of 1-10 (1 being very unhappy, 10 being elated) at the present time, where would you say you are on the scale? I would invite you to reflect on these components of happiness. Which aspects resonate with you? Are there areas you would like to improve in your life?
Self-Assessment-Life-Satisfaction Survey -Online
If you are interested in taking an on-line self-assessment of your satisfaction in life, you might consider taking the Life Satisfaction Index A (LSIA). Developed by the Harvard University School of Public Health, this survey is designed specifically for older adults.
The twenty-two-item questionnaire assesses your degree of satisfaction in various areas of your life. This widely used, readily available, free-of- charge assessment can assist you in determining what’s working and what is not working well in your life. It can be helpful in highlighting where change(s) are most needed and provide guidance on a possible action plan.
The Life Satisfaction Index A (LSIA),
http://www.stproject.org/resources/tools-for-transformation/
Harvard University – Managing Happiness
Harvard University offers a free 6-week course titled “Managing Happiness.”
This course will provide you the opportunity to:
- Explore diverse definitions of happiness and understand its function in everyday life
- Learn how genetic, social, and economic influences impact your happiness
- Apply the science of the mind, body, and community to manage emotions and behaviors for better happiness
- Develop a happiness portfolio focused on your deepest goals and desires
- Recognize how success and achievement impact short versus long-term happiness
- Write your ending- build happiness strategies for your work and life at any age or stage
I don’t know about you, but I am ready to enroll!
The Happiness Project
Several years ago, Gretchen Rubin wrote the book, The Happiness Project.” One day Gretchen has an epiphany. “The days are long, but the years are short,” she realized. She got the sense that time was passing and that she was not focusing enough on the things that really mattered. In response, she decided to dedicate one year to her happiness project. The Happiness Project chronicles her twelve-month- adventure. It is a lively and compelling account of how intentionality, mindfulness and purpose work together to generate more joy and satisfaction in our lives. At the height of its popularity, I ran several happiness groups, using this book as a guide for our weekly discussions. Participants reported making great strides in their positive emotions and overall well-being.
What Brings You Happiness?
So, what brings you happiness? What were some of the happiest days of your life? What were you doing? Who were you with? What emotions were you experiencing?
There is an exercise I find helpful when I am feeling in a rut and not enjoying life.
I make a list of 20 things I enjoy doing. I review the list, and ask myself how long it has been since I have done these things? I then make a commitment to engage in those behaviors that bring me more happiness. A magnet on my refrigerator says – Do More of What Makes You Happy!
For me, turning up the music and singing and dancing to these songs bring instant gratification:
Happy – Pharrel Williams
https://PharrellWilliams.lnk.to/listenYD
Don’t Worry, Be Happy- Bob Marley https://youtu.be/L3HQMbQAWRc?si=KtwtNzKM0iM-59E3
The Time to Be Happy Is Now
Have you ever found yourself thinking that once you reach a certain goal, achieve a certain status or obtain a particular item, you will be happy? Also, have you found that once you have arrived at or achieved your objective, the feeling of joy was short-lived. I have certainly found myself chasing the dream, only to feel cheated when it did not deliver the happiness I had hoped for.
Let’s not get caught up in the If/When Fallacy. The Time to Be Happy is Now!
It seems the ancient philosophers were right when they proclaimed that happiness is not a destination, but a journey. Life is to be savored day by day, moment by moment.
As you can see, there are many avenues we can explore in generating more happiness in our lives. The key elements seem to include positive interpersonal relationships, finding meaning and purpose, and being intentional about creating the life you envision for yourself.
What does happiness mean to you? Like Gretchen Rubin, might you begin your Happiness Project? I look forward to hearing your thoughts.
Warm regards,
Yvonne